5/1/12

Life Is Too Short...

So for those of you who have been reading my blog for a while will know I've been quieter than usual lately. This is because I have gone through a messy relationship break up. My daughter was also injured recently and I've been caring for her, but most of all, I've been healing my own emotional wreck.

You see, I had a bit of an epiphany during that messy break up that life is just too short to spend it with the wrong person. I woke up one day and realized that I was in a relationship with someone who was totally wrong for me. Sure, we both liked the same type of movies and we both enjoyed the same type of food. But these are superficial things to have in common with someone.

We had nothing in common when it comes to life values or future goals.

I'm a creative person. I write for a living. My ex was a corporate slave, believing his job description and willingness to work based on someone else's schedule made him very important, even if it was in his own mind. Many employees simply don't understand the life of a self-employed person, so they make many false assumptions. This just isn't always compatible.

And so I ended it. Enough said.

Unfortunately, as a self-employed person, I don't get the luxury of taking sick leave to help me get enough time to work through those issues in peace on my own. So I kept working. I kept focusing on clients. I stuck to my schedules. I kept doing what I had to do to pay those bills. The ex took multiple weeks off work to wallow in his self-pity at being dumped.

So, what does a self-employed writer do when life keeps going on around them, relentlessly, with no recognition that there's an actual person behind the machine? That writer just keeps doing whatever's needed to keep the business running.

What does an employed corporate slave do when they're feeling a little under the weather? They take sick leave and enjoy some time off, whether they use it wisely or not.

What's the preferred option?

Personally, I'm very grateful for the constant distraction of having to work and keep up with orders and maintain a 'normal' working life, despite what's going on inside. This gave me the wake-up call I needed to tell me that life really DOES go on. It taught me that my own problems don't affect anyone else but me - and maybe my daughter, whose injury means she's at home more often lately.

Besides, I'm actually surprised at how much more productive I've been since I actively focused more on clients than on my other issues. It's really helped to bring the income up to a point where the daughter's medical bills aren't so scary any longer. And that can only be a good thing
:)

2 comments:

jfjones said...

I have always liked your style and viewpoints.

I am glad that things are working out for you.

parsibagan said...

Wishing you all the best Angel. May the Lord shower you with his blessings.